Perplexed in the City

The Sex and the City movie hits theaters on May 30th, the studio is kicking their promotional efforts into 5th gear. This movie's premiere is set to shake up the lives of impressionable, forward-thinking, young women and gay men everywhere. It's the movie equivalent of Uggs and Skinny jeans. However—like skinny jeans, uggs, and other relentless trends—this movie isn’t for everyone. And, from the looks of this picture, it seems like the stars are wondering if it’s even right for them.

Now for my favorite activity, à la Perez Hilton... Let’s Fill in the Blank:

Kristen Davis is ________________.

· Photo-shopped into the picture. She couldn’t make it because she’s been too busy whoring-out every beauty product on the market for the past 5 years.
· squealing, “ooh, a shiny penny!”

Cynthia Nixon is ________________________.
· The new spokeswoman for Forever 21’s over-40 line.
· Doing her best Hillary Clinton impression.
· Very, very uncomfortable.

Sarah Jessica Parker is ___________________.
· Having a nicotine fit.
· Laughing because she makes twice as much money as Kim Cattrall, but has ½ the acting chops.
· So hungry, she’s eating her hair. Someone please feed her!

Kim Cattrall is __________________.
· Wishing she’d shown more clevage.
· Feeling very overwhelmed (you just can’t tell because of all the Botox)
· Thinking, “SJP, if you bump into me one more time, I’m gonna snap your boney ass in two!”

All jokes aside, here is a sneak peak of the upcoming movie. I know I can’t wait! Can you?